Day 16 of Love

And looking at them Jesus said to them,
“ With people this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”
~Matthew 19:26

Today's Challenge:

Take a few minutes to consider what "weeds" may be choking out the unity in your marriage (selfishness, busyness, inattention, laziness, pride, anger, lack of forgiveness, specific sins).
Ask God to help you start pulling weeds this very day.

Think of one practical way that you can plant a seed in the right direction:
Do you need to ask for your husband's forgiveness?
~ Write him a note or call him today.
Is life too busy to devote time and energy to your marriage?
~ Ask your husband if together, you can find a way to make your marriage a priority.
Would your marriage benefit from biblical counseling or other biblical resources?
~ With your husband's blessing, take steps to seek out the help you need.
Have you been faithless when it comes to praying for your husband?
~ Take a few moments and start praying now.
Does your husband need to know how much you care for and value him?~ Follow through with one specific action today that will communicate your love.

Liza Jane says...

After years of marriage you tend to start getting cobwebs in your dancing shoes. Google and I always have "date night" once a week, but it has really turned a bit routine (dinner/movie) and wasn't exciting the way it was meant to be. If you know us, you know that we had a very rocky year in 2009 and were separated for 7 months with me in Hawaii and him in Thailand. Thank you Love Dare for helping us fireproof our marriage! Being apart and the fear of losing our marriage really helped us to realize that the time we have together is a gift and should not be wasted.

So we started talking and came up with a new plan. First, we decided that instead off celebrating our anniversary just one time a year we were going to celebrate it every month with little mini monthaversary. To help us with ideas on things to do I came up with the idea of working through the alphabet (I'm such a teacher!) so each month we will do one or two things starting with the letter we are currently on.

Google thought this was a great idea and started going through the alphabet of restaurants we could eat at! NOT the idea! The things we do needed to be stuff that we wouldn't normally do. For example, we have just started all over at A,  so this month we are taking Archery Lessons together.( May sound lame but it is something we both enjoy.) For "B" we are going to Bangkok and for "C" we are taking an Indian Cooking Class together.

  Google doesn't know it yet, but next month I am dragging him to dance lessons to try to erase some of his white boy rhythm. For "E" maybe the elephant reserve, (of course he is going to say "eat"). The idea is to #1 spend time together doing things that we don't normally do and #2 get out and see more of Chiang Mai. We have so many awesome things here in this little town that tourist come to see, but as locals we never take the time for.  I can't wait to find out all the crazy adventures we might get into this year, and I look forward to spending time with my love! Any ideas for us???

DAy 15 of Love

Today's Challenge:

In what areas are your expectations for your husband unrealistic and possibly smothering him? Ask God to reveal them to you, then surrender those expectations to Him. This week, I challenge you to look for the good things in your husband – then tell him about them! And when he falls short? Extend grace.

Wow! Me smother???? Never!  I have NO IDEA why my grown-up kids call me "Smother", really I don't! 
OK, so getting real with the Lord. there might be a possibility that I, maybe, might smother my husband. But I have an excuse, really I do, and it's a good one! You see, 2 weeks after we were married Google and I moved to China all on our own. We were the only westerners around and the only native English speakers. Not only that but we worked together at the same school. so basically we spent All our time together for the first 3 years of our marriage.


Now Google has his own company he spends alot of time in business meetings and weeks on end in Africa. HATE IT! It is so lonely for me at times. I have really no friends here in Thailand because people tend to come for one or two years then leave. So my husband is the only other adult I have to converse with,  I know I am so demanding of his attention and he is so good about it, but I really need to change.  
I realize that after losing so many friends, I have a problem with meeting people, so today I am taking it to the Lord. Jehovah I pray that you can help me to open up and starting making friends again so that my poor husband is no longer burdened with trying to be my constant companion, and being dragged to chick flicks all the time!

Day 7 of Love

Today's Challenge:

Make the time to nurture your marriage relationship, no matter how old your children are and no matter how old YOU are! Satan would love to see cracks form so that he can get in there and create division and steal glory from God! What a testimony for Christ, to have fought hard to nurture a relationship and to see God turn it into something that He uses for His glory!

Day 6 of Love

I have come into my garden, my bride;
I have gathered my myrrh along with mybalsam.
I have eaten my honeycomb and my honey;
I have drunk my wine and my milk.
~ Song of Solomon 5:1

there are two main ways a woman can pursue their husband:

1. Affirmation - You should be your husband's biggest fan! Tell him you love him, tell him he looks nice, tell him he's a good dad, tell him you appreciate his hard work, tell him he's a hunk! Your husband shouldn't have to live on a compliment you gave him two weeks ago. Make affirming him a primary way you pursue him. It is a lie and a myth that men don't care about feelings or emotions. They want to know you still have feelings and emotions for them! Affirming your husband is a great way to show him your love and desire to pursue him.
   
2. Affection - Your husband wants to know he is desired. It's not true that all he cares about is s*x. He certainly cares about it, but he also wants to be wanted. Be a wife who initiates physical contact.

Today's Challenge:

Think of one or two ways that you can pursue your husband, and put that plan into action today!

Day 4 Of Love

May you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer – may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love. ~ Proverbs 5:18,19Today's Challenge:

Purpose this week to do something that reminds your husband of the youthful wife you once were – maybe it’s wearing something you know he loves on you (remember we dressed to please back in those dating days!), go somewhere you both used to enjoy going together – alone!, look at photos together of the “good ol’days”, watch a favorite movie, or just simply sit together talking, listening, dreaming, holding hands, rubbing his back, and simply paying attention to the amazing husband of your youth! Treasure him this week!

Has it really been 9 yrs??? It is impossible to look back and remember that person who married that man. We had a whirl-wind romance to say the least. I was a free spirited cowgirl running a ranch in Colorado and Google was a nerdy, dungeons and Dragons playing city boy.  I guess I roped him good, because we were married 6 months to the day after we met!! Two weeks after we got married we were off to China to begin our crazy international journey. 
Having MS has really aged me. I try to stay young mentally, but physically I am aging double time. I look like my mom now, and I'm not talking my mom at 40, I'm talking my mom at 60!  I look at myself and think, "Why would my good looking 35 year old husband want to be married to this??"  Depressing huh? 
I have been wracking my brain I and I think that for this challenge I need to have my husband help find me. This week he is away in Africa, but when he gets back I think it will be good to sit and hatch out a road map back to myself. 
Google has some board line- autistic tendencies when it comes to telling the truth. I may hear things I don't really want to hear, but I think that to love him (and HIM) I need to love my self and maybe a shot of truth juice might give me that little kick I need to get there!

Day 3 of Love

For the month of October Time Warp Wife is hosting the 31 Days of Love. Twenty-seven different women will be offering us encouragement and a biblical perspective on marriage. Each daily challenge is designed to encourage us to love the way that God intended according to His wisdom as outlined in scripture.Today's Challenge:

Look for ONE new way today to show your husband that you LIKE being married to him! This will look different for each of you because each of our husbands are different. With a little bit of creativity and prayer, you can rekindle any lost feeling in the friendship area. Also, you may need to put some of your other relationships on hold until your friendship with your husband is real and vibrant!

Everyone gets home about the same time, kids from school & husband from work, so our hello's are a very quick kiss .. starting tomorrow I am going to surprise him with a 15 second kiss when he gets home from work each day! 

 What is one thing that you can do to show your husband that you like him?

It's funny you should bring this up..... This weekend at the Chiang Mai Woman's Retreat I got the great book Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggirichs (that name makes me giggle, immature I know, but hey, I teach 4th grade!) 

Anyway, Dr. E (I call him that) said that he asked some men at one of his seminars if they knew their wives loved them. the men all said a hardy "Yes". then he went on to ask, 'Does you wife LIKE you?' And of course they all said, "NO!"  

Sometimes I can be a bit hateful bitchy when I talk to Google. It's not my fault really, if he would just at least TRY to read my mind and do everything exactly how I want it I wouldn't have to yell at him right????  OK, so maybe I need to really start watching the way I talk to him so the poor guy doesn't go to the next men's retreat and tell everyone how his wife doesn't like him. 

So, what can I do to show my darling that I love him??? This one's a no brainier.  First I have a confession to make. Google LOVES to be the first one up in the morning so he can be the first one Pickles sees when she wakes up. I have to agree that it is so awesome to see that smile, but he's the bad part, ready??? OK (hiding my face in shame) sometimes everyday I pretend to be sleeping so my darling will make me a cup of coffee. My love even quietly sneaks in and puts it by my bed with a lid so it will be hot when I get my lazy butt up. 

Was I NOT the one who just wrote about how I wanted to be a good wife???? The real shame of it is how truly grateful Google is when I get up and make HIM coffee. So the one thing that I am going to do from now on is get out of bed and make my man some coffee EVERYDAY. I promise!

31 Days of Love

For the month of October Time Warp Wife is hosting the 31 Days of Love. Twenty-seven different women will be offering us encouragement and a biblical perspective on marriage. Each daily challenge is designed to encourage us to love the way that God intended according to His wisdom as outlined in scripture.

Day 2~ Welcome Home Daddy

Today's Challenge:

1. Memorize:

Psalm 19:14 May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 139:23-24 Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. 

2. Find one thing in today's post Welcome Home Daddy that you are not doing and do it this week to honor Christ, your First Love, so you can joyfully serve your Second.


This Past year things have gone topsy turvy in our little household.  For starters we decided that I should stay at home and not work. For the most part I miss my classroom am really enjoying being a SAHM. but the other big change is the Google (my DH) is now working for the most part at home. I try to leave him alone while he is work and respect his office space, but being home alone with a 6 month old can be a bit quiet. I often find myself asking him dumb questions just to talk to someone.  While I would love to talk to him about his day and so on, I already know it is pretty uneventful. and rubbing his feet, well, that's kinda creepy and he sits on his bum all day. Maybe I should rub his bum??
I think for us the biggest thing I can do for him is bring him his lunch everyday ( so times I really blow him off) and I think I need to stop bugging him if he is working.  UGH! I hope this baby starts talking soon so I can ask HER where the hammer is!

31 Days of Love

For the month of October Time Warp Wife is hosting the 31 Days of Love. Twenty-seven different women will be offering us encouragement and a biblical perspective on marriage. Each daily challenge is designed to encourage us to love the way that God intended according to His wisdom as outlined in scripture.

Day 1- Bringing a Gift of Love

Two Years ago my marriage was hanging by a string. I was in Hawaii and my husband was in Thailand not wanting to be married to me anymore. I had given up and was ready to wash my hands of everything, when I had an epiphany. There I was in the tub, praying, crying the "ugly cry" (you know the one) pleading to God, "why can't I just find the perfect man???" Suddenly in the mixt of all the crying I was filled with a complete calm. The Lord spoke to me as I sobbed in my suds. He told me, "I gave you the perfect man, he's right there. He may not be perfect, but he's perfect for you."

I realized then and there that I had been blaming everything on my husband and it was time for me to start taking responsibility for MY actions. I finally understood that I needed to figure out what was wrong and I needed to do my darndest to fix it.  

Believe me it was not an easy road to where we are today. My husband was not the easiest to get on board. After years of feeling disrespected he just didn't have the heart to try again. I didn't give up though. Instead of trying to change him, I learned that I needed to change ME. 

I still have a lot of learning to do, but I can wholeheartedly say that It is no longer a burden but a joy to work on being a Proverbs 31 wife and mother. So, along that note, I have joined
Time Warp Wife and the many others who will take the 31 day love Challenge. I hope that through out the next 31 days, the words of my sisters will continue to help me on my path.

 Here is Today's Challenge:

Read 1 Corinthians 13 (the love chapter) and jot down some of the thoughts that come to mind such as:

• What is God's definition of love?
• What are the characteristics of love?
• In what areas of "loving" do I stumble the most?
• What are a few of the steps I can take toward changing?

If you are joining me in this journey, please leave a comment and let me know how you are facing this challenge!

The Good Wife~ To Be or Not To Be

Can I just say, I WANT to be a "Good Wife"?  I have read so many posts about this article originally ran in the 1955 Housekeeping Monthly. It goes like this......


* Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favorite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
* Prepare yourself. Take fifteen minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
* Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
* Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.
* Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his personal comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
* Be happy to see him.
* Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
* Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not one of them. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
* Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.
* Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself body and spirit.
* Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.
* Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
* Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
* A good wife always knows her place.


You HAVE to read all the controversy!  Good Golly Miss Molly, have we become an uptight , outspoken society or what???  Ladies PLEASE, is it really so bad that  they say a good wife knows her place? If you are a Christian girl, there is no arguing! God said it, we gotta do it.  Now, don't get me wrong there are things I am just not EVER going to do cut his nasty toe nails. But, my husband knows HIS place and would never ask me to do these things if he knows what's good for him..  But I do honestly want to be the wife that Housekeeping Monthly suggest we be.  And YO SHOULD TOO. At 43 35 years old I have been through a lot of relationships and have a lot of experience so I can tell you ladies, Christian or not, that the  key to a good marriage is learning to take a step back and try to acknowledge YOUR part in the relationship.  According to the book The Truth About Cheating:

"Ninety-two percent of men said it wasn't primarily about the sex. "The majority said it was an emotional disconnection, specifically a sense of feeling under appreciated. A lack of thoughtful gestures," Gary says. "Men are very emotional beings. They just don't look like that. Or they don't seem like that. Or they don't tell you that."

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/relationships/Why-Men-Cheat_2/2#ixzz1UWIOMLMp

We have been raise as strong, independent bullheaded woman, which is good, but girls we need to understand that sometimes we imasculate our men.  Now Please, don't be a hater and yell at me because I am NOT saying to kiss your husbands a** or be a doormat. What I AM saying is that if you LOVE someone, you WANT to please them and to make them happy.  There is a balance, we just have to learn it.  Being a single mom for 12 years, I can be a bit of an over powering, know it all bitch. I am learn day by day to step down and let my husband take the lead as the head of the household. It's not always easy, not always fun. So sorry critics, by I am using The Good Wife as a reminder so I don't have to take the "Is your husband cheating" test.

For more fun Check out Roxanne and Haven of Home for her SUPER take on this too!

Dating ABC's

After years of marriage you tend to start getting cobwebs in your dancing shoes. Google and I always have "date night" once a week, but it has really turned a bit routine (dinner/movie) and wasn't exciting the way it was meant to be. If you know us, you know that we had a very rocky year in 2009 and were separated for 7 months with me in Hawaii and him in Thailand. Thank you Love Dare for helping us fireproof our marriage! Being apart and the fear of losing our marriage really helped us to realize that the time we have together is a gift and should not be wasted.

So we started talking and came up with a new plan. First, we decided that instead off celebrating our anniversary just one time a year we were going to celebrate it every month with little mini monthaversary. To help us with ideas on things to do I came up with the idea of working through the alphabet (I'm such a teacher!) so each month we will do one or two things starting with the letter we are currently on.

Google thought this was a great idea and started going through the alphabet of restaurants we could eat at! NOT the idea! The things we do needed to be stuff that we wouldn't normally do. For example, we started all over for 2011 so this month we are on "C" and are taking a cooking class together and going camping.  Google doesn't know it yet, but next month I am dragging him to dance lessons to try to erase some of his white boy rhythm. For "E" maybe the elephant reserve, (of course he is going to say "eat"). The idea is to #1 spend time together doing things that we don't normally do and #2 get out and see more of Chiang Mai. We have so many awesome things here in this little town that tourist come to see, but as locals we never take the time for.  I can't wait to find out all the crazy adventures we might get into this year, and I look forward to spending time with my love! Any ideas for us???

B is for Boat....Scorpion Tailed boats!  http://www.scorpiontailed.com/

Mud huts shaped like boats and a river cruise. LOVED it! And the best part was that my DH planned it all himself!

Can't wait for this one!
Elephant Mahout!

"The Good Wife" To Be or Not To Be????

Can I just say, I WANT to be a "Good Wife"?  I have read so many posts about this article originally ran in the 1955 Housekeeping Monthly. It goes like this......


* Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favorite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
* Prepare yourself. Take fifteen minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
* Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
* Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.
* Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his personal comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
* Be happy to see him.
* Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
* Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not one of them. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
* Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.
* Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself body and spirit.
* Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.
* Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
* Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
* A good wife always knows her place.


You HAVE to read all the controversy!  Good Golly Miss Molly, have we become an uptight , outspoken society or what???  Ladies PLEASE, is it really so bad that  they say a good wife knows her place? If you are a Christian girl, there is no arguing! God said it, we gotta do it.  Now, don't get me wrong there are things I am just not EVER going to do cut his nasty toe nails. But, my husband knows HIS place and would never ask me to do these things if he knows what's good for him..  But I do honestly want to be the wife that Housekeeping Monthly suggest we be.  And YO SHOULD TOO. At 43 35 years old I have been through a lot of relationships and have a lot of experience so I can tell you ladies, Christian or not, that the  key to a good marriage is learning to take a step back and try to acknowledge YOUR part in the relationship.  According to the book The Truth About Cheating:

"Ninety-two percent of men said it wasn't primarily about the sex. "The majority said it was an emotional disconnection, specifically a sense of feeling under appreciated. A lack of thoughtful gestures," Gary says. "Men are very emotional beings. They just don't look like that. Or they don't seem like that. Or they don't tell you that."

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/relationships/Why-Men-Cheat_2/2#ixzz1UWIOMLMp

We have been raise as strong, independent bullheaded woman, which is good, but girls we need to understand that sometimes we imasculate our men.  Now Please, don't be a hater and yell at me because I am NOT saying to kiss your husbands a** or be a doormat. What I AM saying is that if you LOVE someone, you WANT to please them and to make them happy.  There is a balance, we just have to learn it.  Being a single mom for 12 years, I can be a bit of an over powering, know it all bitch. I am learn day by day to step down and let my husband take the lead as the head of the household. It's not always easy, not always fun. So sorry critics, by I am using The Good Wife as a reminder so I don't have to take the "Is your husband cheating" test.

For more fun Check out Roxanne and Haven of Home for her SUPER take on this too!